The People around Me

I am an Chinese American, who have been raised and taught to follow both Chinese and American culture. Being raised to follow two cultures, it has had a big influence on me. Being a Chinese, I am suppose to outsmart those around me and to picture the best for myself, to succeed in everything. However, being Chinese in a very little diverse school was hard on me. In my grade, I was one of the minorities and it was dreadful that no one knew how I saw things and no one understood the pressure in being yellow-skinned when everyone else was white. However, the ways I saw things were not merely placed in my mind by myself. It had a lot to do with the people around me.
In this picture, it is of me with my two brothers in Chinatown, San Francisco. They were part of the influence that has shaped me into who I am today as well as other people around me, such as my parents, and friends. I remember a day back when I was in kindergarten: I was playing with some of my friends, yet I didn't know English very well since my parents only spoke Chinese at home; one girl came up to me and asked my to say something in Chinese. That was when I knew that I was really different from everyone else. They judged me through the color of hair and the color of skin I had and since I was of a different race, I would know a different language. I didn't take too much into it at the time, but looking back now, it is human nature to racially discriminate or judge.

My parents always told me to not take too much into what others think of me and that I was different inside and out; that I shouldn't really trust people much. I always thought that the friends I had in middle school until the end of high school would always be there for me and that they only judge me for who I am. However, nearing the end of high school and starting college, I found that they did judge me through my skin color and that people are more deceitful than they appear, they may be your friends when they want you to be, but when they don't need you anymore, they forget about you instantly. Then again, I never let my high school friends see my true identity. The only one true friend in high school is a girl (she and I are shown in the picture below) I have known before school and society influenced us and made us into who I am today.

I stayed guarded because of my parents, because what they said, I knew was true. In college, I met a lot of people of my ethnicity and found that I compared more to them than I did to my high school friends. They showed me what true friendships were about and that I could be myself rather than someone I'm not. I think this is partly because I feel that they understand more about what I went through growing up as a Asian American.

My brothers are also a big influence in who I am today. My big brother has always been a big factor in determining my identity. Although he is not like most big brothers, he still made me strive to be my best and to try to outdo him in everything. His quietness has made me into a quiet person as well since it has made me see that being quiet has more power to it than speech at some times. My big brother isn't protective of me like most big brothers, but that has taught me how to defend myself against anything one throws at me and I don't regret having a big brother like him. My little brother, on the other hand, has made me become caring and compassionate. He has helped prepare me to be something more than a big sister, but potentially a mother someday. He has looked up to me and made me try to be the best I can be, to be a role model for him and to inspire him to be his best, to outsmart me and all others surrounding him. I truly wouldn't be the person I am today without my brothers.

Lastly, my parents are the biggest influence I have had throughout my life since they are the ones that raised me into who I am today. My mother is a strong, independent, caring, yet sometimes irrational woman. She was my best friend for most of my life and she always will be there whenever I need her. She has been a role model for me since I could remember. She does so much for us and so little for herself. From her, I have learned to care for others as she did and still does for me. From my father, I have learned how to be a hard worker and to fight for what I believe in. I learned a sense of pride of my ethnicity and to cherish being different.

With my story laid out, it's really the people in my life that has had the biggest influence on me. My parents has influenced my ways of thinking and work ethnic as an American Chinese. My brothers have made me compassionate and competitive. My friends has taught me society's methods and behavior. I wouldn't be the compassionate, caring, competitive and hard worker I am today if it wasn't for all the people surrounding me.